Mental health, menstruation and menopause – problems related to these 3 M’s exist in every woman’s life. But they are rarely recognized. These topics need to become as simple as any dinner conversation, says mental health advocate Neerja Birlawho is also an educationist, mother of two daughters and a son and wife of Indian industrialist Kumar Mangalam Birla.
At home, the 52-year-old tried to normalize conversations by encouraging all her children to abandon all euphemisms. “We are very comfortable talking about it. It’s a very open discussion. If one of us is on our period, we just say, “I’m on my period or I have PMS.” It’s a light conversation. My kids also tell me, “You’re so fuzzy, you have brain fog, or your memory is bad.” We chat lightly on one subject or the other, and it doesn’t matter at all! »
Growing up, this was not the environment Neerja Birla saw. Like most girls in most Indian homes, she faced social norms and myths around menstruation.
“Most households had certain protocols, like not going to the temple during menstruation or going to the kitchen. But little by little, I began to debate the logic because I no longer resonated with it. I didn’t think it was fair and decided I didn’t want to put my daughters through that,” says Neerja Birla in an exclusive conversation with Health Shots.
It was when her eldest daughter, singer-songwriter Ananya Birla, reached puberty that Neerja Birla began to drive progressive change in her country.
Perimenopause or menopause in a woman’s life is also stigmatised, believes the founder and chairman of Mpower, an initiative of the Aditya Birla Education Trust.
What is menopause?
The World Health Organization (WHO) describes menopause as the end of a woman’s reproductive years. The transition to menopause usually occurs in women aged 45 to 55, but younger women can also experience it. It is marked by 12 consecutive months since a woman’s last period. This transition can lead to symptoms such as hot flashes, night sweats, vaginal dryness, irregular sleep, urinary incontinence, mood swings, dry eyes, headaches and more.
There’s a lot going on, but women are suffering in silence.
“Personally, I think menopause and everything surrounding it is a bigger taboo than periods. I don’t hear any woman say: “I’m in perimenopause or menopause” or “I don’t have my period anymore” or “This is what I’m experiencing”… I don’t know why, even if it is the case . the most obvious and natural progression for us,” she says.
Menopause can affect mental health
The two worlds of menopause and mental health tend to intersect.
“When hormonal changes take hold, they can impact mental health. This can become serious if left unchecked. Feelings of loneliness and depression set in. The menopause phase also occurs at a time when your children are growing up and starting to need you less emotionally and physically. For women, this begins to create a void in life. It’s a huge change and transition, and it takes time to get used to a new routine and new expectations. All this left unchecked can lead to mental health problems,” says Neerja Birla.
How to break the stigma around menopause?
The solution to breaking the stigma lies in talking about it more – just like she does with mental health, and her youngest daughter Advaitesha Birla does with periods.
“Menopause is like any other subject where we want to break the chains that surround it. The only way is to steer the conversation around this topic to normalize it. We have seen this gradually happen in the mental health field. There is nothing shameful or embarrassing about menopause because it happens to every other woman. Everyone is sailing this boat, but no one talks about it,” she adds.
In her own social circle, for example, she can imagine how simply saying the word “perimenopause” could cause “awkward and deadly” silence. But she believes raising awareness about menopause is a journey that has to start somewhere.
What also needs to be normalized is seeking support during this difficult transition.
“Not pharmacological support, but general emotional and mental support. At least it is enough for people around women of menopausal age to understand that being a little more emotional, crying, feeling depressed, having memory lapses or being blurry is part of it. This support will start by talking about it and normalizing it.
Watch Advaitesha Birla talk about breaking the stigma around periods!
Women should prioritize self-care, says Neerja Birla
Self-care plays an important role in Neerja Birla’s life for her physical and mental well-being and agility. Neerja Birla shares her own ‘health shots’ that help you stay fit and fabulous beyond 50.
1. Exercise
“Exercise is my choice for self-care. I need that adrenaline and a dose of rejuvenation every day,” she says. Going for an hour’s walk also does wonders for her. In fact, she thinks people really underestimate the benefits of walking.
2. Family time
“Spending time with my children is my balm… It’s my refuge,” confides the adored mother.
3. Stay connected
She says, “Being connected to family and friends who lead such busy lives is truly a blessing. »
4. Nature
Neerja Birla prefers to be outdoors and in touch with nature. “Being outside is therapeutic. »