People who walked in darkness saw a great light.
This is what Isaiah, the prophet whose words are an integral part of the Advent season, declares. Roughly two millennia later, many still walk in darkness, and the number who struggle to see the light is increasing.
A 2023”The State of Mental Health in America» report published by Mental Health America found that more than 50 million Americans suffer from mental illness. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) adds that vacations only make life more difficult for people with mental illness, with 64% of people see their condition deteriorate in December.
And according to the Reverend Sarah LundMinister of Disability and Mental Health Justice for the United Church of Christ, isolation and loneliness contribute to the crisis. She points the latest statistics from the Centers for Disease Control and Preventionwhich revealed an increase in suicides in the country, particularly among the elderly population.
“This is a key demographic in our faith, and it’s important to remember that this is a generation where depression is still stigmatized. You just don’t talk about it,” Lund said.
Give hope to the holidays
HAS First Congregational Church of Christ in Glastonbury, Connecticut., Rev. Kate VanDerzee-Glidden starts conversations and spreads holiday cheer to those who might feel isolated. Each year, each teenager in the confirmation class is assigned to make a Christmas visit with an elderly member of the church.
“It’s a wonderful way to connect generations,” she said, adding that holiday visits are precisely what teens talk about most when thinking about their confirmation journey.
Another way UCC churches can more intentionally reach those who are grieving, alone, or suffering from mental illness is to offer a Blue Christmas or Longest Night service. While the the origins of the service are unclear, Blue Christmas began in the early 1990s. It is sometimes called the “longest night” because the service is traditionally offered around the winter solstice (this year, December 21). These are typically contemplative worship services that create a safe space to name people’s struggles and provide a place where it is okay to not be okay.
“I hope that congregations will be open to the call to be part of the hope that is coming into the world,” Lund said, emphasizing how Blue Christmas Services seem to be gaining popularity among UCC churches. “Blue Christmas worship creates a space for hardship and where not everyone is happy.”
The UCC National Framework has been hosting its own Blue Christmas and Longest Night services for several years, and this year is no exception. The Global HOPE team led a Blue Christmas service on December 5while nourishing the soul final 2023 offering will be longest night service on December 21.
Accepting grief
Reverend Donté Jones knows how important it is to carve out space for grieving during the holidaysespecially since the congregations he leads – Table of Wisdom at UCC Saint-Pierre And Grace UCCboth in Lancaster, Pennsylvania – are in the difficult, hopeful and sometimes painful process of becoming one congregation, Wisdom and Grace UCC.
“If anyone can attest to the grief and loss, it’s these two congregations,” Jones said. “Our life together is full of hope and sorrow, especially during major liturgical seasons like Advent, where the loss of church facilities results in the loss of simple traditions that anchor us in sacred memories. “
On December 20, the two congregations, both of which recently sold their facilities – along with the Lancaster community – will come together for a Blue Christmas service called “Seasons of Reflection.”
“Members of both congregations have courageously agreed to share their personal stories of grief this holiday season, addressing topics such as divorce, death, addiction, incarceration, LGBTQIA+ discrimination/family rejection, and much more,” Jones said.
Special musical guests from local theaters will be in attendance, accompanying the congregation in holiday-themed songs chosen by each storyteller.
The Blue Christmas service is also a partnership with two local organizations. One of them is West Art Lancaster, a group that purchased one of the two congregations’ facilities, Jones said, and now uses it as a performance hall and art gallery, as well as a community space for 12-step, yoga and church groups. The other partner is Hospice and Community Care, which provides free bereavement support services to individuals. Funds raised during the service will benefit the organization.
Beauty in brokenness
For Jones, however, the highlight of this year’s Blue Christmas service will be the reintroduction of an art installation that means so much to him. It is a broken heart that was created a few years ago by the members of the Table of Wisdom for the season of Lent.
The heart is tied, reminiscent of an ancient Japanese art form known as “kintsugi» where broken pottery is remelted with gold to symbolize the beauty of brokenness.
“In my view, this grief-stricken heart is not ‘healed’ or ‘repaired,’ but divinely cared for and ‘added to’ reflecting a new reality and a new story,” Jones said.
After the Wisdom’s Table property was sold, the heart was set aside, becoming a subject of personal sorrow for the pastor. The heart is no longer in storage and will take center stage during the Blue Christmas service.
“This heart gives new meaning to our Blue Christmas service, symbolizing our collective grief. It represents the pain and beauty we feel in grief and the hope that life can continue with new meaning that does not replace but complements our story,” Jones said.
And it’s not just an excerpt from a pastor’s sermon.
In 2020, as Advent began, Jones lost his father, Rev. David Jones, to COVID. It was a “devastating shock,” Jones said, because he and his family believed his father’s case was not life-threatening. However, the morning he was due to be released from the hospital, the family learned he had died. He was only 60 years old.
“Instead of the usual festive preparations, our Advent was spent writing obituaries, arranging a burial site, and selecting clergy robes for my father, a tradition in African-American communities which involves burying pastors in clergy vestments,” Jones said.
Community and authenticity
Although his loss was deep and profound, Jones also learned that grief was not his adversary.
“I came to understand that this is the body’s way of recognizing my father’s love and desire. I am learning not to fear grief, but to open my heart to it and let it pass, however long it takes,” he said. “I believe many UCC congregations offer a unique gift to their neighborhoods: genuine ears ready to listen to stories of grief, a rarity in a time when tolerance for sadness is low.”
For Lund, she hopes her attentive ears will continue to hear the laments, whispers and groans of those who walk in the darkness long after the Christmas lights have gone out. She urges congregations in 2024 to become more intentional in their relationships with others: having a meal with someone, calling, visiting via Zoom. And not just create community, she adds, but practice authenticity.
“We have become experts at masking our pain,” Lund said. “Start asking the question: “How is your soul?” »
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