Today I feel compelled to share a personal story about managing mental health while working in the construction industry. This is a topic close to my heart, as I personally know the challenges faced by people who suffer from bouts of depression or who struggle to seek help when going through difficult situations. It can become incredibly stressful when working in an industry that is still grappling with how to meet the mental health needs of its workers. And while it hasn’t been easy, the construction industry continues to face the complexities of supporting people with mental health issues. In this personal account, I will delve into my recent experiences and highlight the profound lessons I have learned that apply to the industry.
Recent challenges
Around September 2022, my daughter discussed celebrating Christmas Eve with family and friends at our house. It’s been a long time since we’ve done it, so I said why not? Let’s do it. Alena created the invitations and sent them to everyone. At first, she didn’t receive many responses, but as the day approached, almost everyone responded with a RSVP. We were both very excited and planned to have about twenty to thirty guests.
We had fun with music, good food and games on the day, and everyone had great conversations. At some point early in the evening, we realized that everyone Alena had invited was there, plus a few extras. The more, the merrier, we thought. So, during the festivities, we were able to socialize and have fun with family and friends for several hours. I was in my living room talking with my sister when suddenly I heard a noise in the family room. There it was, two family members having an all out fight on my couch. I removed one from the other and escorted one to the front door to separate them. It was complete chaos, with adults screaming, children crying and me totally appalled that this was happening in my home on Christmas Eve!
Since they were two young adults, it wasn’t as simple as saying stop and let’s talk. No, both of them wanted blood, so to keep my family safe, I chose to call the police. By the time the police arrived, one of them had already left, but by then my house was in turmoil, with broken dishes, toppled planters, young children scared afterwards, and my family in shock. As I looked around my house, I broke down and couldn’t believe what had happened. After reporting to the police, cleaning the house, and apologizing profusely to everyone as they left our house, I had a moment to think about what had just happened.
Coping with trauma
As a father, you pride yourself on protecting your family, but that day was a total failure. Watching my children cry, upset and trying to protect their little cousins was upsetting. It felt like a violation, and I didn’t realize the trauma was just starting to set in. The next morning, Christmas Day, I remember sitting downstairs early that morning, looking around as I replayed the night and how I felt. I was sad, angry, distraught, and physically and emotionally exhausted.
A few weeks later, the vacation period was over and it was time to return to the office, so I left for my usual fifty-minute commute at 5:30 a.m. Luckily, that morning I had a regular counseling session via Zoom before I started work. It was not my original intention to share the details of the event with my counselor, but luckily I did, and she was wondering why I was at work after experiencing such a traumatic event. I thought I was good; It’s been a few weeks. How wrong I was!
Getting real with myself and others
It was great to see my colleagues again after a long break and we started the usual small talk “How was your holiday”. As I listened to the familiar stories of pleasant engagements with family members, I realized that I was not doing well. This became evident when it came time for me to share my vacation activities. Interestingly, I shared the raw truth with them and quickly discovered that I needed to return home immediately. That’s exactly what I did after coming full circle on a few pieces of work.
Taking care of yourself and asking myself tough questions
I headed back home with a feeling of relief and pride at having chosen myself first and foremost in real time. Once home, I slept, had quiet time, prayed, and thought about where I was. I said to myself:
- Why do you always feel the need to be superhuman?
- Why are you more inclined to support others before thinking about yourself?
- Why is it difficult to allow yourself to put on your figurative oxygen mask first?
This traumatic situation forced me to confront these questions and more. Yet the crucial point is that I allowed myself to become vulnerable around people I typically wouldn’t be and respond in a way that promotes self-care. It was an inspiring moment.
I realize there are no one-size-fits-all solutions to mental health, but I would like to share what I have learned through my experience.
Essential Lessons for Mental Health and Self-Care
- Recognize and Address Traumatic Experiences: I was confronted with a traumatic event at a holiday get-together, which left me feeling overwhelmed and violated. It is essential to recognize and address the emotional impact of such experiences.
- Seek professional support: I attended a counseling session after the traumatic event and shared the details with my counselor. Seeking help from a professional provides a safe space to discuss your emotions and receive advice on coping mechanisms.
- Be honest with yourself and others: Instead of putting up a facade, I was honest about my feelings when interacting with colleagues. Opening up about difficulties can lead to understanding, empathy and support from others.
- Have a supportive work environment: I always knew my company supported me, but my experience was always primarily about providing support to others, without accepting it for myself. By receiving the help I needed, I felt valued and respected.
- Prioritize self-care: I realized the need to take care of myself, so I went home and took time for myself – this involved activities like sleeping, reflecting, and having quiet time for myself. recharge and process my emotions.
- Ask yourself tough questions: I faced some critical questions about my tendency to prioritize others over myself and the need to be a constant pillar of strength. Thinking about these questions can help identify patterns and areas of personal growth.
- Accept vulnerability: The traumatic situation made me vulnerable and open to people I wouldn’t usually confide in. This vulnerability fostered self-care and fostered a sense of empowerment.
These lessons highlight the importance of recognizing your emotions, seeking support, and prioritizing self-care in managing mental health while working in a challenging industry like construction.
Closing words
In the demanding construction industry, prioritizing mental health, self-care and vulnerability can be both challenging and crucial for individuals. The nature of the industry often involves high pressure situations, tight deadlines, physically demanding work and a culture that values tenacity and resilience. As a result, mental health issues can be overlooked or stigmatized, leaving workers feeling isolated and unsupported.
However, it is crucial for people working in the construction industry to recognize the importance of mental health and self-care. The stress and challenges of the industry can take a toll on physical and emotional well-being. Ignoring these issues can lead to burnout, lower productivity, strained relationships, and even more serious mental health issues.
Taking care of your mental health and taking care of yourself is not a sign of weakness but a necessary step in maintaining overall well-being. This requires recognizing personal limitations, asking for help, and implementing strategies to effectively cope with stress. By prioritizing self-care, individuals in the construction industry can improve their resilience, reduce the risk of mental health issues and improve their overall job performance.
Additionally, accepting vulnerability can create a supportive and empathetic work environment. When workers feel comfortable discussing their mental health concerns and seeking help, it fosters a culture of understanding and compassion. It enables colleagues and employers to provide the necessary support and accommodations, thereby improving well-being and job satisfaction.
We can promote a healthier and more supportive working environment by recognizing the unique challenges of individuals in the construction sector and emphasizing the importance of mental health, self-care and vulnerability. Taking steps to create a workplace that values the well-being of its employees can ultimately lead to a more productive, engaged and resilient workforce in the construction industry.
Our construction site or company culture significantly shapes progress in mental health within our industry. Let’s look at how this can be a source of support or a barrier to better mental well-being. Together, let’s fight for an industry where everyone feels seen, supported and able to prioritize their mental health.
